Female of the Week: Nina Dobrev

This "Female of the Week" or "FOTW" is none other than Nina Dobrev. Before being on The Vampire Diaries (a favourite of mine), Nina was on Degrassi: The Next Generation. She is involved in charities, is an amazing actress and a perfect role model for many young teenage girls, as she hasn't been involved in drinking and drugs like other Hollywood stars.

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Inspirational Thursday

I give to you, the quotes and pictures I have found inspiring this week:

"It's not wrong to consider some mistakes, what makes it wrong is when you allow them to do it again." - Gerard

"What makes people special is not the happiness you feel when you are with them, but the pain you feel when they are away from you." - Edno Beltran

"I AM MYSELF, sorry if i don't fit your standards." - Emma

Amazing articles from Rookie Mag:

A Procrastinator's Guide to Getting an A
Pop Culture Comfort Food
Fight Like a Girl
The Perks for Being a Killjoy
How We Dress Does Not Mean Yes

The Negative Community.

The true reason behind this blog is to bring forth positive energy and hope in the female community. The idea came around after reading so many negative status' on Facebook and hearing so many females at my school have such negative opinions about their bodies, personalities and intelligence. It saddens me that so many girls have such negative opinions of themselves. But the 'negative community' isn't only just negative about themselves, they are also much more likely to be negative towards others: saying negative comments or bringing up someone else's flaws. I also read on the Internet that the majority of people are negative by nature, but honestly, in my opinion, you don't have to be. To me, being negative wastes way to much energy, energy that can be useful elsewhere.

The many status' that I have seen lately have continually been negative: "I hate my life", "FML", "Why does this always happen to me?", "Why am I always sooooo jealous?" and many others. These status' seem only to be ones seeking attention, but is there any back story behind it? Sometimes these status' may just be for the attention, yet after looking around further on the web, there can be reasons behind negative comments, not only on the Internet but in our real lives.

Reasons for Someone May Be Negative:

• They may be depressed.
• They may have a horrible past.
• Their life isn't going so great at the moment.
• It may be a coping mechanism.
• It makes them feel better about themselves.
• It becomes habitual.
• They may not be in touch with their emotions.

Signs You Are Being Too Negative:

• You're complaining a lot, usually over everything.
• You always notice flaws.
• When others are talking about positive things, you have to be constantly negative about it.
• If things go well, you have many reasons as to why it 'sucks'.
• On social networking sites you constantly post things that consist of being negative or "I hate my life."
• You always see yourself as the 'victim'.

But how does one become more positive and drop the negative attitude? While it may seem somewhat impossible, I went looking across the web for methods that may help you in becoming a more positive, happy person:

• Live more in the moment and don't dwell on the past, move on.
• Practice being positive and focus on it.
• Face your fears - scared of it? Do it!
• Be aware that you are being negative.
• Simply, just try to hold your tongue.
"This isn't something you can exactly seek out, but if you ever find yourself around another negative person, it can really show you from an outside perspective how irritating it can be. That may give you the push you need to cut down on this behaviour yourself." [http://www.succeedsocially.com/negative]

Now, I'm not saying that I cannot be negative myself, but I try to live my life being positive. Out of all my friends and family, I seem to be the most positive. But being positive doesn't just happen. A few years ago I was quite negative about myself and did some things I wasn't proud of, but after that year I became focused on changing my ways and being positive about myself. Since then, I couldn't be happier! I am extremely happy with my life right now, and I find that having a positive energy benefits you not only mentally, but physically and socially as well.

"Don't point out other people's flaws because you're not perfect; you have to look in the mirror before you can look out the window."

"Whatever makes you feel bad, leave it. Whatever makes you smile, keep it."

"Yesterday's gone, we gotta keep moving on."

How to be a Strong Woman, (with the help of five television beauties).

These are not the only five ways of becoming a strong woman, or even a strong person in fact, but what I personally try to do every single day of my life. Throughout our lives we seem to be tested by various things, we go through heartache, hardships, pain and misery, and sometimes we just don't believe that we are strong enough. But trust me, you are strong enough, you can get through anything that you put your mind to. Now, with the help of these five beautiful television characters, these are what I believe make a strong woman.

1. Brooke Davis (One Tree Hill) - Determination

One thing always made Brooke Davis the best character of One Tree Hill and that was her determination. Her determination to become a successful fashion designer, to be a great friend, to make things right, to become a mother and find the love of her life, made her a strong woman. When she wanted something, she went for it. She was ambitious and creative, and her sheer willfulness pushed her towards her goals. "So here in sum is how determination seems to work: it consists of willfulness balanced with discipline, aimed by ambition." [http://www.paulgraham.com/determination.html]

"Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all."

2. Manny Santos (Degrassi: The Next Generation) - Make Mistakes and Learn From Them

It is no surprise that Manny Santos made a number of mistakes during her time at Degrassi Community School. From boyfriend stealing and getting pregnant, to revealing herself on camera, Manny made mistakes but also learnt from them. But these were vital mistakes, if she had not made these mistakes she wouldn't have grown as a person, she wouldn't have the strength and independence. I'm not saying going out there and make millions of mistakes, but if you make a mistake you should learn to accept it, learn from it and learn to move on.

1. Don't lie to yourself.
2. Don't cry over your mistakes.
3. Don't make up excuses.
4. Don't think any less of yourself.
5. Don't repeat these mistakes.

"You can only learn from a mistake after you admit you’ve made it. As soon as you start blaming other people (or the universe itself) you distance yourself from any possible lesson." [http://www.scottberkun.com/essays/44-how-to-learn-from-your-mistakes/]

Veronica Mars (Veronica Mars) - Don't Take Crap From Anyone

What I loved about Veronica Mars more than anything was not only her loyalty to her father, but how she dealt with the crap she received from the people at her high school and later on college. Her inner strength should be an inspiration for all young women. Veronica Mars was always herself, she never pretended to be anyone else or a lesser person than she was. Accept yourself for who you are, if you're good at cooking or enjoy watching science fiction television shows, don't let people put you down for being yourself.

How to Be Yourself (because who is better than you?):

• Avoid fixating on the past.
• Stop caring about how people perceive you.
• Be honest and open with yourself.
• Express your individuality.
• Don't compare yourself to others.
• Follow your own style.
• Be bold.

4. Elena Gilbert (The Vampire Diaries) - Don't Let a Guy Define You
Something that makes Elena Gilbert the perfect role model for young woman is her independence, bravery, loyalty and the fact that she does not need a man to define her. Despite loving Stefan Salvatore with every part of her being, she does not want to give up life to become what he is (hello, Bella Swan anyone?). She wants to have a career, a life, a family, but just because she loves Stefan doesn't mean that she is going to give all of that up. There is more to life than boyfriends and guys, and it saddens me that many young women define themselves by the amount of boyfriends they have had or the way their relationship is playing out. Yes, having a relationship is great, but allowing it to define you is not what you want. This goes for the same when you are not in a relationship. Not having a boyfriend or a husband or whatever, does not automatically make your future one with over one hundred cats.

5. Rachel Berry (Glee) - Do What You Love
Rachel Berry's passion is performing, and over the episodes of Glee we have seen that she not only has a passion for the performing arts, but she has incredible talent. Now, your talents may not be singing or dancing or acting, but could be along the lines of writing, science, mathematics or gardening. Knowing what your talents are and working hard at them, but also having fun, will make you a much more stress free, happier person. There is something about writing and reading that makes me happy, calming me down instantly. I always feel better afterwards. Doing what you love and not ignoring the fact that are good at it, will make you a better person. Being told what to do or being told you suck at something you enjoy is not something you should do. Follow your heart, follow your dreams.

Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.

Friendships: The Good, The Bad & The Ugly.

Elena, Bonnie and Caroline - The Vampire Diaries

I was eight years old when I lost my first best friend. It wasn't because of a fight or an argument, but she moved away. She was the first person - the only person really - who made me come out of my shell, although it was to the point of getting in trouble with the school principal by pulling up my dress to a group of boys, anyway! When she moved away, it was hard, but because I was eight and found it easily to make new friends, I moved on, but it was hard at first. The second time I lost a good friend was when I was eleven. We had a huge argument and even to this day we still haven't talked. To be honest, I don't even remember what the fight was about, but it screwed our friendship up to the point where we will honestly never be friends again. Ever.

Losing a friend or stopping a friendship is one of the hardest things you can ever do. No matter what age. But sometimes ridding your life of a certain friend can be a good thing. Though, how can it be a good thing you may ask? Well, when I was fourteen, my supposed 'friend' began bullying me to the point where school became the one place I avoided like the plague. I hated it, even though once upon a time, I loved it (yes, I am the geek who loves school :P). She verbally bullied me, and later on, a number of my other friends began turning their backs on me, siding with her. I didn't want people to 'side with me', I didn't want there to be sides at all. But that 'friendship' began hurting me, over and over again. Though, to this day, a small part of me is thankful for her turning into this - to put bluntly - bitch. I would never have the strength and independence I have today. And it also showed me who my true friends were.



Cristina and Meredith - Grey's Anatomy



At fourteen, I was obsessed with Grey's Anatomy, and envied the friendship that Meredith and Cristina had. It hurt knowing that my 'friends' treated me like a piece of crap, while these two young women treated each other with respect and love. I wanted a friendship just like theirs. I wanted the loyalty and the respect, I wanted to have somebody that I could talk to about my problems without being judged.

A year later, when I was fifteen, I became good friends with three other girls. I'd known one since I was four and the other two since the seventh grade. But our good, strong friendship didn't really begin till we were fifteen. Now, at seventeen, I depend on these three girls. I trust them, I tell them my problems and stories, and I know that they won't judge me. I finally have that Meredith/Cristina friendship I dreamt about for a year. I no longer had to hide who I truly was at school, I had people who loved me for who I was.

But, this blog post isn't all about my ups and downs on the friendship road, but to tell you some useful things about true friendships. I hate seeing young girls go through the same thing I went through at fourteen, the toxic friendship that almost ruined my academic career and social life. No one should feel as if their school is the worst place in the world. Nobody.



Clark and Chloe - Smallville



It's a tough decision if whether or not you want to cut a friend out of your life. But sometimes, the best thing to do, is let a toxic friend go. If you are part of a toxic friendship you may feel depressed, stressed and extremely down on yourself. When I was fourteen and being bullied constantly by somebody I thought I could trust, I began to believe everything that she was saying. That I was stupid, that I was worthless, that I was ugly. I felt completely lost. But sometimes the signs aren't always that easy, other things may cause you to take an extra look at your friendship.

• Do they return your phone calls, messages, etc?
• Cancel plans?
• Only talked to you/call you when they want something?

Manny and Emma - Degrassi: The Next Generation

I guess we are all looking for that perfect friendship, that somebody, or group, that makes us feel great about ourselves. We want a friendship like Elena/Bonnie/Caroline, Meredith/Cristina, Clark/Chloe and Emma/Manny. We want a friend we can completely count on, and trust me, they are out there. Sometimes it takes a while to find them. I was fifteen when I found my best friends. I went through hard times, lost a couple of good friends and almost felt like giving up on the idea. But good friends - best friends - are out there somewhere. You just have to believe, and have a little faith. The best memories that I have are with my best friends, the shopping trips, the movies, school projects, stupid jokes, stupid nicknames, stupid adventures we had, pictures, birthday dinners and the time one of them had their finger stuck in a bowling ball.

A true friend is someone that you can trust, depend on, have fun with, be yourself around, love, care for, hang out with and be truthful to. You want a friendship where you feel like sisters, brothers, family, not a friendship that leaves you feeling like a piece of dirt. That is not a friendship, and you should never ever accept one that makes you feel like crap. Again, that is not - and ever will be - a friendship. Do yourself a favour and move on, make new friends. Now, I leave you a funny, wonderful, friendship quote: "Friendship is like wetting your pants: everyone can see it, but only you feel the true warmth."

Have you ever been in a toxic friendship? Have you ever lost a best friend? Do you have a good group of people that you trust and respect? ♥.

A New Year, A New Blog, A New Me.

Welcome to not only 2012, but the official Hewitt Rose blog. I sit here, trying to find the perfect way of introducing myself to you. I thought about listing things, or one of those poems where you put your name and something about you goes with a certain letter... What are they called?... But, as I'm sitting here in my bedroom, my laptop on my knees as I watch How I Met Your Mother reruns...again, I have come up with the perfect solution. Now, don't laugh at me. I am about to explain to you my bedroom (not in a creepy/freaky way, I shall add). As I believe, my wonderful sanctuary will explain me well.

Piles upon piles of DVD's are on my bedroom floor, but the ones close to my bed are the ones I have watched not only recently, but obsessively. Stargate Universe, X-Men, Stargate Atlantis, Supernatural and How I Met Your Mother. These all represent my love for science fiction (I am a true geek at heart), my constant need for Barney love and my first television crush Jensen Ackles. In the drawer next to my bed are my guilty pleasures: gossip magazines (millions of them) and my DVD collection of Keeping up with the Kardashians (♥). Next to me is my beloved IPhone, my third can of coke zero tonight, my black nail polish, a dozen candles and my IPod. But despite all of these things, my room is a mess. I can't remember what my desk looks like and my floor is a mess... :). I am not very organised, so I'm surprise I actually wrote this blog post in time. ;) Joking.

Anyway. Not only is this blog post about the wonders of Hewitt Rose (don't you just love people who talk in third person?), but also the upcoming year for this blog. What is ahead for this blog? But really, how did it all begin? Well, the idea came to me after reading so many negative status' on Facebook by young women. I saw how little they thought of themselves, and then I began to see this everywhere: at school, on Tumblr, on Twitter, even my friends were saying negative comments about themselves. I hated seeing young women like this. I'm not sure if it was annoyance or the fact that it made me upset, but I wanted to start something which promoted positive energy. This is how the blog came about.

To be honest, I have been sitting here, thinking of a creative, inspiring way to finish this blog post. I am going to leave you with a quote that I am absolutely in love with, something that everyone everyone should remember. But, before I do, I would just like to tell you that tomorrow will be a blog post about friendships. The importance of a good friendship and when they turn bad.

"No matter how good or bad you think life is, wake up each day and be thankful for life. Someone somewhere else is fighting to survive." ♥.